The arrival of the vibroplate has got us all in the mood for getting fit
SINCE THE hip debacle (by the way I re-measured my hips with Himself's tape measure when I got home from the dressmakers and all I will say is that they must measure differently in Eastern Europe!) I've been talking about getting fit. I'm good at talking about things. Not so good at actually putting my words into action.
And then the other day, a leaflet popped through the letterbox. It must have been fate. A crowd renting out gym machines for use at home. Perfect I thought. It would mean I wouldn't have to change out of my pyjamas to exercise. Nor would I have to be bothered about all those gym bunnies and muscley dudes making me feel inadequate as I fall off threadmill again.
I decided on the vibroplate because from the pictures, it looked like all you had to do was stand there while it jiggled you up and down and you end up looking like Elle Mcpherson. Yeah Yeah, I know, silk purse and sow's ear and all that, but it was worth a go.
I posted on Facebook to see if anyone had ever hired one before and got loads of replies back. It was the post from a friend of mine who said the delivery guy was hot, that clinched it for me. When you're a housewife you have to do these things to amuse yourself!
The machine arrived, with the hot delivery guy last Wednesday. Lovely fella by the name of Kevin. He set up the vibroplate in the corner of the kitchen and was kind enough to go through all the exercises with me. I didn't actually do any of them, I just admired him while he did press ups on my kitchen floor!
Of course I wasn't listening to anything he was telling me about the machine and when he left half an hour later after giving me an extra week free (I'd say that was to try and get away from me) I hadn't a clue what I was supposed to do on it. It languished in the corner for four days until Himself had a go at me for wasting money and saying he knew I'd never use it.
Obviously I had to prove him wrong and so with the help of my gym instructor (the nine year old) we embarked on my fitness regime. Let me tell you it's a lot harder than it looks. As the Child shouted things like 'come on step it up Mum. Five more.' bits of me that I didn't even know I had, jiggled and bounced, making me feel slightly seasick. It also made me think that if I was fit, nothing would be jiggling at all.
So far I can see no difference. (OK I've only done it twice but still....) but I'll keep at it, if only to shut Himself up (I notice he has been sneaking onto it when he thinks I'm not looking). Meanwhile I've invited the neighbours over next weekend for a "vibro" party.
Get your minds out of the gutter!!
- Justine O'mahony
