Hurricane Ophelia proved the perfect vehicle for our mass hysteria
What is it about Irish people and catastrophes? We love nothing better than a good old drama, especially when it involves danger and possible risk to life. Hurricane Ophelia proved the perfect vehicle for our mass hysteria last week.
My own code red precautions consisted of putting the Youngest's Flicker in the porch and taking the washing off the line. I also said a little novena that the tree overlooking our house, which has been blocking my sun in the garden would fall victim to the elements, since the council had refused to cut it down for me.
Of course me being the brave soul that I am (or silly cow, take your pick!) I decided to venture into work for the craic. The drive in was lovely and relaxing. Not a sinner on the roads. I made it to work in record time only to discover an empty office.
Apparently everyone else deemed it safer to work from home, I somehow had failed to get the memo. I decided that seeing as I was there I might as well do a bit of work. However no one answered my calls. Everyone, apart from me obviously had the same idea - stay home, stay safe.
11 a.m. arrived. Time to grab a coffee. I made my way to my local coffee shop only to discover every single shop and café in town was closed. At this stage, the sun was shining and the hurricane consisted of a few leaves blowing around the pavement.
I headed for the local supermarket to buy provisions - wine, tea bags, bread and cake. What else could you possibly need? Clutching my vino tight to my chest I legged it to the car, thankful that I had managed to get my priorities right.
At home, two slightly hysterical youngsters were waiting for me. One was nervous the house was going to blow away, the other was feeling cheated that there wasn't more……destruction basically.
'You know it's not really a storm unless Teresa Mannion is on it and she's not,' The Fifteen Year Old declared, pointing to some other poor rainsoaked craytur on the RTE news. Himself arrived home and said he had closed the office out of shame because they were the only ones in the whole town still open.
So we all sat on the couch looking at each other and waiting. We're not used to being in such close proximity to each other without anything to do. Christmas day is the only other time we all sit on the couch together and then the adults are usually drunk so it doesn't count.
Fifteen minutes in and the arguments start over what we're going to watch on the telly. There's still no sign of any major storm and I can't even online shop because the internet is down.
After an hour Himself sends the children to their bedrooms to stop them fighting. It's only 2 p.m.
'Is it too early for a drink?' he says messing.
'It's never too early for a drink, especially when there's a hurricane. Sure didn't Richard Branson drink his way through the last one on Necker?'
Chin Chin folks!
Wexford People
